Passages

I cried in church today.  Not for anything sad, but simply because so many emotions were bubbling up inside me they had to find a way to leak out.  At first I shed a few, wipeable tears, but then I felt the sobs coming so hard that I had to bury my head in my husband's chest to keep from making a scene.  He barely stifled a giggle while he patted my back.  (You see, I am quite the empathetic crier; and - whether happy or sad - most of the time my emotions show up in tears.  It can be quite comical at times!)

I cried because today we held a special service, a service I had never heard of nor experienced.  (We are Episcopalian, so most of our liturgies are written in the Book of Common Prayer.  After more than twenty years in this denomination, I thought I had heard them all.  Guess not.)  I'm reprinting it here, in its lengthy entirety, because I feel like there are some moms out there who might need to hear it (and dads too!).  More than that, maybe some of you need/want to pray through it with your own pre-teens.  Whatever the reason, I'm definitely feeling led.  So, whomever this is for, I pray God's blessings over you.

PASSAGES: CELEBRATION OF THE TRANSITION FROM CHILDHOOD TO ADULTHOOD (Our church invited children and parents/caregivers of twelve-year-olds to stand at the altar throughout this service.)

The Presentation and Examination

Presider        The Candidates for Passages will now be presented.  Dear People of God: throughout life's journey we encounter moments of change that call us to grow.  In the relationship between parent and child there are many such moments of challenge and grace.  Though each of these has unique burdens and joys, adolescence especially requires greater patience, forgiveness, courage, and hope.  Parent and child must learn to risk and let go.  These children and their parents come to this faithful community to offer thanks for all that has been, and to seek God's blessing for all their futures.  We join them in acknowledging and celebrating the transition as they stand on the threshold.

Who is ready to begin this new phase of life?

Parents and children present each other, one family group at a time.  Godparents and other significant adults may also stand with the parents and children.

Young person         This is my mother/father, (Name), who has raised me and loves me.

Parent(s)                This is my son/daughter, (Name), whom I love with all my heart.

Young persons and parents together
We stand before God and before our faithful community to acknowledge that we are in the midst of a change that calls us to fresh ways of understanding one another.  Help us be thankful for all that has been and for all that is to come.  We trust God's constant love and pray a blessing for this time of transition.

The sponsors address the young people and adults, saying (in this case, the youth minister)
(Names of young persons present), you are made in the image of God who has held you in love every day of your life, and always will.  Remember your divine Maker who formed you in joy and remolds you for the changes that lie before you.  The Creator who knows you delights in the work that prepares you for your roles in Christ's healing of the world.

The Presider continues
Let us recite Psalm 139.  The congregation is asked to recite the antiphon, and the candidates (young persons) will recite the verses.

Psalm 139
Antiphon          Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.
Candidates       Lord, you have searched me out and known me;
                         you know my sitting down and my rising up;
                         you discern my thoughts from afar.
                         If I take the wings of the morning
                         and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
                         Even there your hand will lead me
                         and your right hand hold me fast.
Antiphon          Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.
Candidates       For you yourself created my inmost parts;
                         you knit me together in my mother's womb.
                         I will thank you because I am marvelously made.
                         Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.
Antiphon          Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.
Candidates      My body was not hidden from you,
                        while I was being made in secret
                        and woven in the depths of the earth.
                        Your eyes beheld my limbs, yet unfinished in the womb
                        all of them were written in your book;
                        they were fashioned day by day,
                        when as yet there were none of them.
Antiphon          Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.
Candidates      Search me out, O God, and know my heart;
                        try me and know my restless thoughts.
                        Look well whether there be any wickedness in me
                        and lead me in the way that is everlasting.
Antiphon          Your works are wonderful, and I know it well.

The Presider addresses the young people, saying
(Names of young persons), will you continue to honor your parents, respecting their life experience, and remembering their love for you?

Young People  I will with God's help.

Presider           Will you strive to make decisions that honor your body, your spirit, and your relationships?

Young People  I will with God's help.

The Presider addresses the parents, saying
(Names of parents), in the sacred responsibility of giving and sustaining life, you reflect the image of God.  These children are God's gifts to you, as truly as you are God's gifts to them.  Remember that God has never forsaken you, and will always be near, in this and in every good work to which you are called, for which you respond in faith.  Know that you are ministers of God's love to these young people.

Will you respect the dignity of your sons and daughters, listening to all that they tell you, even allowing them to make their own mistakes when you may responsibly do so?

Parents           I will with God's help.

Presider          Will you set limits and spacious boundaries for these young people, intended to keep them safe and well?

Parents           I will with God's help.

Presider, to parents and young people
Will all of you be patient with yourselves and each other, practicing forgiveness and forbearance, and holding fast to love's courage, joy, and hope?

Young People and Parents
We will with God's help.

Presider
Will you remember to include the outcast, love the lonely, and practice mercy?

Young People and Parents
We will with God's help.

Presider
Will you be faithful in attending church, studying the Scriptures, and saying your prayers?

Young People and Parents
We will with God's help.

The Peers (all 6th-12th graders) now stand.  Presider, to the young people's peers.
Dear friends, as these young people move beyond the circle of their families, they will need faithful friends.  Will you stand by them, knowing that there may be times when your support means more than any other?

Young People        We will with God's help.

The entire congregation stands.  Presider, to all the People:
Will you as their Christian community support these young people and their parents during their time of change and growth?

Congregation
We will.  We welcome your presence among us, honoring the gifts of insight and freshness you bring us.  We will sing and pray with you.  We will challenge you to be generous and compassionate as you serve Christ in your home, at church, and in the world.  Will you do the same for us?

Young People and Parents
We will with God's help.

Presider
Let us now pray for these young people who seek God's blessing and ours as they journey into adulthood.

Intercessor
Deliver them, O Lord, from the way of sin and death.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Open their hearts to your grace and truth.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Fill them with your hold and life-giving Spirit.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Keep them in the faith and communion of your holy Church.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Teach them to love others in the power of the Spirit.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Send them into the world in witness to your love.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
Bring them to the fullness of your peace and glory.

People
Lord, hear our prayer.

Intercessor
I invite your intercessions and thanksgivings.

Presider
Grant, O Lord, that these young persons, all baptized into the death of Jesus Christ your Song, may continue their earthly pilgrimage in the power of his resurrection, and may wait in hope for his coming again in glory, who lives and reigns now and for ever.  Amen.

The Blessing
The Parents may gather around and lay hands on the young people, as the Presider offers this blessing:
All Holy God, source of every blessing: we thank you for the mystery of growing up, the transformation of body, mind, and spirit that brings children to adulthood.  We marvel in this and all your works.  Give these parents and young people grace and courage, patience and good humor, respect and compassion, and unfailing hope, as they travel together through life, sister and brothers united in Christ and his household, the Church.  We pray in Jesus' name.
And all God's People say Amen!


Linking up with Michele for "Hear it on Sunday, Use it on Monday".  If you have a chance, read some of the other linkers and leave encouraging comments!