Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Why is it always God, God, God?

About a week ago I tried to institute a new family tradition: communal Bible story reading followed by circle prayer time before night-nights.  My kids have outgrown their previous, more baby-ish routines, and it's gotten a little too hectic trying to do one routine with each kid, soooooo...this is the new plan.  For now.  We'll see how it goes.

Any-who, we were a few days into this plan, all four of us snuggled on the couch reading from the Jesus Storybook Bible (which I highly recommend), when my four-year-old son sighed and said:

"Mom, why is it always God, God, God?"  (Can't you just hear the exasperation in his voice?)

His question was completely straight-faced, but my husband and I couldn't help ourselves: we burst out laughing.  He laughed along with us but repeated himself, insistent:

"I mean, all over this book, it's God this and God that.  Where are all the superheroes?"

We answered in between our chuckles:

"It's the Bible - it's God's book.  So of course, God will be all over it."

"What do you mean, 'where are the superheroes?'  This whole book is full of superheroes!"

(And on and on....)

We laughed our way into bed, making comments to ourselves about the funny things kids say and so on.

But yet, the question has haunted me.  I can't get it out of my mind.

Why is it always God,  God, God?

You see, my son begs to read this Bible every night.  He sits enraptured, completely engrossed as I read the stories of God's redemption plan. 

Let me paint you a picture: he's a four-year-old who never stops moving, and yet, he sits perfectly still - and quiet, I might add - all the way to the end of the story.  (My two-year-old still climbs all over me during the process, but that's a different story.)

So why, when he begs for it, even asks me awesome questions each night when I'm finished reading, does he also get tired of the story and want to make it go away?

It's like a person who is holding out one arm, palm faced up and out in a "don't come near me" manner, while the other arm is bent at the elbow, its hand waving you closer.

This is the picture I've had as my son's question has echoed in my mind all week.

Another question - my own - follows: "why do we do that?  why do we push and pull against God like that?"

Because we all do it, don't we?  We all want Him, want His presence, His fruit, His glory, yet we also push Him away.  We make choices that place ourselves first, not Him.  We whine and complain when He asks us to do the hard things.  We get bored with Him, wanting something more exciting, like ______ (insert your distraction of choice...mine can sometimes be as simple as mind-numbing TV, honestly).

So I've been thinking about this all week, wondering if I want Him as much as I think I do.

But I've also been thinking about the way Gunnar keeps asking, and we keep reading, and he keeps listening.

No matter what we do or don't do, you see, it is always God, God, God. 

And we'll never stop hungering for that, will we?

Linking up with Soli Deo Gloria - check it out!  There are some real treasures over at Jen's place.

Monday, May 14, 2012

I'm Alive

Yesterday at church our priest built his sermon around this central idea:

"Don't ask the question: 'what does the world need?'  Ask the question: 'what will it take for me to come alive?'  Because what the world needs is people who are alive."

He was weaving together the lectionary passages that talk about the Holy Spirit's active presence in the lives of those who follow Jesus.

I don't have a lot to say, really.  I just wanted to share what hit me as a profound thought:

"Don't ask the question: 'what does the world need?' Ask the question: 'what will it take for me to come alive?' Because what the world needs is people who are alive."

So, what will it take for you to come alive?

And, are you asking the right question?

Linking up with Hear it on Sunday, Use it on Monday.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

The Right Path

This has been a big week.  Justin started his new job today (can I get a whoop, whoop!?!).  I'm into week three of my new job (selling Arbonne products, which I love - let me know if you want some!).  My kids have two weeks of preschool left before the (gasp) summer.  And I signed up for an agent consultation at the Texas Writers' League's Agents Conference.

Most importantly, however, I've been feeling good.  Great, actually.  My doctor added a second prescription, which seems to be really helping.

That's why it was a big bummer when I fainted last night.

No, that's an understatement.  I didn't just faint.  I was down and out.  (We almost went to the hospital - it was that bad.)

Then, this morning, during his first hours on the new job, Justin got the call that his beloved grandmother is dying. 

Needless to say, after dealing with a relatively major emergency last night and then getting a call about his grandmother this morning, we were...shall we say?...derailed.

The good news?  We've walked with God long enough to realize that this sometimes happens.  When you're walking on the path God has clearly made possible for you, the s*%t sometimes hits the fan (pardon the expression).

So here we are, walking the walk and loving it.  There's resistance, yes, distraction, yes, but there's also peace, perseverance, and, ultimately, great, great fulfillment.

I'm looking forward to seeing where our feet take us in this new season.  And I have to say, whatever comes: bring it on.

Linking up with Soli Deo Gloria today.  I hear it's quite the party this week!

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Best Birthday Ever...And It's Not Even My Birthday Yet

I turn 35 this Friday.  The celebrations began early.  They've been spread-out but low-key.  I can honestly say this has been the best birthday ever (and, already).  Why?  Because I've let go of control.

My typical birthday MO is to freak out ahead of time, pre-determine that there's no way the people who love me will fulfill my expectations, freak out some more, and decide to meet my own needs before anyone even has a chance to try.  Then, I normally get mad at those around me because they didn't meet my needs, and I had to do everything.  Like I always do.

I know...awesome.  What can I say?  I'm cool like that.

My birthday modis operandi is a microcosm of all my junk.  Lovely.

This year, however, it's been great.  People have asked me what I want.  I've told them.  And then, I've let it go.

And you know what?

It's all worked out.

All by itself.

With very little help from me.  And certainly without me controlling the whole process.

The result has been joy-filled, peaceful.  I've found every mini-celebration pleasurable, enjoyable.  It's been really nice.

And really easy.

And, I've gotten everything I wanted.  Every dream fulfilled, every desire met.  Already.  Before we've even gotten to the big day.

I wonder what analogy we could draw from that. I wonder what God is trying to show me through this significant shift in Jenny Roan Forgey's modis operandi.  I wonder what the future will hold.

I can tell you one thing for sure: I have no need to know, to plan, to control.  I have a lot of hope for the future, and great peace about it.  Whatever comes will come.  God will always be God, and He will always meet me where I am. 

I can trust that He fulfills my heart's desires, sometimes even earlier than expected.

And that's all I need to know.

Linking up with the ladies at Soli Deo Gloria, my blogging home away from home.