I turn 35 this Friday. The celebrations began early. They've been spread-out but low-key. I can honestly say this has been the best birthday ever (and, already). Why? Because I've let go of control.
My typical birthday MO is to freak out ahead of time, pre-determine that there's no way the people who love me will fulfill my expectations, freak out some more, and decide to meet my own needs before anyone even has a chance to try. Then, I normally get mad at those around me because they didn't meet my needs, and I had to do everything. Like I always do.
I know...awesome. What can I say? I'm cool like that.
My birthday modis operandi is a microcosm of all my junk. Lovely.
This year, however, it's been great. People have asked me what I want. I've told them. And then, I've let it go.
And you know what?
It's all worked out.
All by itself.
With very little help from me. And certainly without me controlling the whole process.
The result has been joy-filled, peaceful. I've found every mini-celebration pleasurable, enjoyable. It's been really nice.
And really easy.
And, I've gotten everything I wanted. Every dream fulfilled, every desire met. Already. Before we've even gotten to the big day.
I wonder what analogy we could draw from that. I wonder what God is trying to show me through this significant shift in Jenny Roan Forgey's modis operandi. I wonder what the future will hold.
I can tell you one thing for sure: I have no need to know, to plan, to control. I have a lot of hope for the future, and great peace about it. Whatever comes will come. God will always be God, and He will always meet me where I am.
I can trust that He fulfills my heart's desires, sometimes even earlier than expected.
And that's all I need to know.
Linking up with the ladies at Soli Deo Gloria, my blogging home away from home.
So sweet that last line -- your blogging home away from home. I wonder...maybe we could add this to the SDG mission statement??
ReplyDeleteLove how God has totally given us space to relax and enjoy our birthdays. Can't wait for tomorrow!!
This must mean that today is your birthday??? Happy Birthday. I pray you continue to feel blessed all year.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday!!! I have to say I relate an awful lot to the control and let down! Good to know that it was better than you imagined when you let go. God is awesome like that. I agree with Jen, SDG mission statement- now we need more shirts!! :)
ReplyDeleteHappy, happy LATE birthday! You young thang.
ReplyDeleteControl? Who me?
I used to build up "date nights" with my husband so much that I'm not sure there is anything the poor guy could do to meet my expectations (well, a surprise flight to some deserted island might work). Amazing what happens when we just try to let the details go.